#aging

Birthdays

/ kathyawhitespeaks / Leave a comment

This is the 64th year I get to feel this crisp October breeze on my face.
And no, I’m not afraid, ashamed or any of those words the world pushes on us to say I am this old. I’m happy I can still experience this, my favorite time of the year.

My birthday is in two days and I’m reflective.

I’ve been told in the past I think too much. Is that really a thing? Can rigorous introspection about one’s self be a bad thing? No.

I guess when you get to this age you do tend to take a really close look at your life. Or at least I am.

I’m hoping, and I do think, those sharpe edges I had in my youth have been soften or at least worn down a bit.
The running so hard to prove I was somebody and to show the world I had worth. The wasted time of being hurt by rejection and clamoring to be notice. Not knowing back in those early days the power I truly possessed.

God, if I’d only known, but knowing only comes with time. Time, if you’re paying attention, is the most eloquent teacher.

Now time is the thing I value the most.

With leaves turning and temps dropping my mood bends towards soothing grateful sounds. As if the sound of calmness is floating in my head.

Does calmness actually have a sound? Yes.

Hope, Always

/ kathyawhitespeaks / Leave a comment

What is yours will find you.

I saw this written recently on a social media post that is meant to inspire going into the new year.

In lives often loaded down with disappointment and failure one seems hard press to actually believe this aphorism.

Failed marriages, broken relationships, lost jobs and everything else that can make you feel like you’re on the wrong path.

To waste time, regretting and ruminating over why some things did not work in your favor is an act of futility.

This writer is always full of hope as to what magical surprise is right around the bend. Things change, you change.

Listen closely, pay attention.
There is something out there for you, and it will find you.

Happy New Year.

Are You Maturing or Just Getting Old

/ kathyawhitespeaks / 7 Comments

  
Physical maturity is inevitable, emotional maturity is not.

The things you learn in maturity aren’t simple things such as acquiring information and skills. You learn not to engage in self-destructive behavior. You learn not to burn up energy in anxiety. You discover how to manage your tensions. You learned not to trust your emotions, they’re ephemeral. You learn that self-pity and resentment are among the most toxic of drugs. You find that the world loves talent and beauty but pays off on character. You learn you can be a successful failure by chasing the wrong passion. When you find your purpose, your provision will chase you. You learn if you are true to who you are and what you believe, it will open doors, not keep them closed. You learned that competition taken to extremes can be a form of mental illness. You learn to stop trying to hit the high notes of the past and move on to the next thing. You learn to be your own shrink and ask yourself the tough questions. You learn to do your best even if your best is just getting out of bed. You learn to tolerate disappointment. You learn there are going to be bad days, but not to make it into a life position. You come to understand that most people are neither for you nor against you; they are thinking about themselves. You learn sacrificial love equals the highest form of love and that love is a very serious business. You learn that some of your major mistakes have had love as an accelerator. You learn that no matter how hard you try to please, some people in this world are not going to love you, a lesson that is at first troubling and then really quite relaxing.